Our virgin island (Koh Phi Phi, part one)

You think you know Thailand by now, you start to meet the locals and begin to communicate poorly enough to stop getting ripped off. You think that you are getting a handle on the culture and the way things are run and then something like Koh Phi Phi comes along and smacks you right in the face, and the arm, and the leg.

Let's go to Phi Phi island

We got to the ferry station fighting a pretty standard hangover and see our boat. Two to phi phi please? Return ticket, I don’t want to get stuck there like so many lost souls before us have. As we board we find a seat next to some gorgeous girls who just happen to be from Canada. (We really do have some of the hottest girls on the planet).

Setting off gunpowder right beside

The boats out here are luxury, depending on how you want to travel. If you want to longtail that is fine too but I would rather not spend my time crossing the ocean doubled over and clutching the rail like I’m about to lose Clooney in Gravity (spoiler alert?).

She looks beautiful

Picture of the trip so far

We arrive at the docks on the island and chaos ensues. Luckily we've learned to stay away from the hordes of Thais trying to get you to come here or go there. We gravitate towards the reggae bar that features a boxing ring right in the bar where absolutely anyone can fight each other with full pads and headgear. Ryan and I made a pact to beat the living crap out of each other that night. Like many things we planned to do however, we drank too much and it would have been like a couple 180 pound babies hitting each other with sacks of jello and tears.

Some cool English girls

The guy in the red was losing

Until we fed him some buckets and gave him some pointers

Yeah that's right

Decided to stay across the street. 800 baht, not bad. Met a couple Aussies and I set off to get the maple leaf on my heart with a bamboo needle. Mostly every shop on the island is owned by a mean lookin’ mofo of a former boxing champion named Leo. He took one look at my skinny white ass and I’m pretty sure he told them in Thai to charge me double. Nope.

Amazing artists, waaaay too much money

Finally found a place to it for a reasonable price and set to it. Still needs some work but that will work itself out. I ended up thanking them with a flag I had brought from home and put some Calgary Flames on it. Had to balance out the giant Canucks flag they had hanging in there. Cause you know, fuck the ‘nucks.

More my speed

Feels good!

Thanks Tapear Tattoo

King, putting up the flag

Looks good

That is when the fire started. Not sure who started it but we didn't. Oh there was a flaming skipping rope. Yup. Burn on the leg from that one.

Oh there is a flaming hoop to jump through! Yup. Burned my wrist.

Oh limbo awesome! Even more awesome when you soak the bar in kerosene and light that shit up! Yup. Burned my face pretty gnarly on that one. Luckily it’s in the spot where I can’t grow hair anyways so at least now I have an excuse. Oh and after every daring (stupid) stunt you pull, they have a shot of something interesting waiting for you at the end. 

Welcome to Phi Phi Island assholes,
Daniel Double-u