Everywhere you go there is a scam. Istanbul is the only predominantly Muslim country I have visited but maybe they are all like this. I met four kind-hearted Turkish people in the 14 days I was there. Everyone else had the singular goal of separating you from money as expediently as possible.
Like I've said before, it was still fun. And once they see around you a couple times they stop trying so hard. But those first few days it gets annoying fast.
When you really think about it, this system of scams is probably preferable to the North American setup anyways. At least anyone with half a brain can avoid the obviousness of some guy shining your shoes without permission or a street barker yelling at you to look at their shitty rugs. There is no organization to the scam, it's just the way they do business and you can say no and go to the next business that is cheaper. It's how pure capitalism is supposed to work in theory.
Instead we get organized scams on a systemic level, the ultimate outcome of any economic system involving humans will always be to figure out the best scam and escalate it as far and wide as possible. Turn it into an oligarchical level money extraction where you have no choice in the matter anymore. Reference: Canada's mobility networks, or the Alberta UCP political party. (Although the second one is more a reflection of the stupidity of the voting majority in Alberta and the UCP's ability to manipulate all types of media). If you don't agree with me go on facebook and cry with all the russian bots that will get you fired up about something different in 24 hours anyways, fuck outta here.
Anyways, rant over. I did hear about one Istanbul scam that was pretty freakin' organized. Likely more mafia related. It happened to another traveller that was staying at the same hostel. A Dutch guy in his 20's named Matt.
It started just like any other day out there. Matt was wandering around the city, taking in the sights and uncovering the incredible history of Istanbul. It is important to mention he was alone on this day. It's also important to mention that Matt is a cool, social and outwardly kind person. This is exactly the type of guy that the con-artist population of this city feeds upon every day.
So he gets approached by another seemingly nice and social Turkish guy. They end up talking for a while about history and cultural practices (something Matt is fascinated by). Eventually they stop at a cafe and grab a coffee and time is flying by. Of course it is, when you are a solo male traveller it is easy to let your guard down in the spirit of a friendly local who is knowledgeable about the locality. That is most of the reason (the good) travellers are travelling.
They end up spending most of the afternoon chatting and generally celebrating life as it passes them by on the street. Despite the eccentricities of humanity, their indomitable spirit will always leave a wealth of reasons to celebrate no matter where you are in the world, let alone one of the most interesting cities out there.
So at this point the Turk guy asks Matt to go to a bar for drinks. (This is the point in the story where I raised my eyebrows, I've always heard the "second location" rule, but when I think about it, that applies to attacks and this was in the form of someone who you had just spent the better part of the day with). They go the bar and have a couple drinks.
Some more context here: the drinking culture in Turkey is very tourist forward. Every tourist business is designed in a very scammy exploitative way, and this only works because there are an incredible amount of rich (and incredibly stupid) tourists in Turkey from every country. Of course you want to have a crazy night while travelling, but at what cost? And if there are attractive girls around, the drinks will be expensive (and likely so will the girls). Now, I am not saying Matt is one of those stupid tourists, this particular scam was very developed and I'm of the opinion that anyone could have trusted this guy after spending the better part of the day with him.
Also context: I did a "pub crawl" previously that was organized by the the hostel. So, I was already aware of the tourist drinking culture in Turkey at this point. It was about 10-1 in favour of men in every establishment and it was actually gross how the attractive girls got mobbed and "boxed out" so other guys couldn't even come close. And then if any girl actually was open to interaction, she was for sure a hooker.
So, back to the protagonist of this story. Matt was in the second location (more of a pub but not quite to the level of a "club" yet), he is enjoying the company of the knowledgeable friendly local and becoming more comfortable by the minute, the alcohol certainly loosening his grip on discernment even further. They eventually pay the tab at this location and Matt is feeling generous towards his new friend, so he pays for the few drinks, no big deal. The nice thing to do in return for all the cultural insider knowledge and wisdom he has gained from this new friendship. I would have 100% done the same.
Then came the turning point of the night. Turk asks Matt if he wants to meet some girls. Now, I've met a lot of people travelling, the dudes that say they aren't interested in meeting girls or "that's not what this trip is about maaan," are either 1. in a relationship 2. gay 3. or lying. Talking to cute girl while travelling or even starting a little whirlwind romance (if you get super lucky) is a unique and fuckin awesome time. But in a place like Istanbul, it's a little harder, you gotta be fortunate with the right group at the hostel or in daylight hours because the Turkey bar scene is 1000% not happening. But how the hell is anyone supposed to know this until they experience it. Most guys usually have to get tricked into dancing with about 4 hookers before they start to clue in. A lame realization to come to for sure, but a necessary one.
More context: on weekends, bars will only let a group of dudes in if they are charging over $20 a drink. Other than that it's "only couples" allowed at the popular places, or you can go to a less popular spot and drink with a bunch of dudes in a small spot. Which, all things considered beats dancing with hookers all night. Unless you love hookers and blowing money, then fill your boots.
Matt doesn't know any of this yet and wants to meet some local girls (who doesn't). They go to the next location (third location!) where there are some girls and a few guys sitting around drinking. The girls are a little friendly and start the conversation with Matt as they ease into the night, its currently about 7:00pm and Matt has had a few drinks by this point already. They all have some shots together eventually and being the generous guy he is, he buys one of the pretty girls a couple drinks so they can get to know each other better. A bit of time passes and Matt's newest friend (lets call her Zerha) starts getting a little closer. He buys a couple more drinks and has a few more himself. Now it's about 9:00pm. Matt's feeling good at this point and asks Zerha if she wants to grab a drink somewhere else. She replies with a coy smile: "go pay first and then we will figure it out."
Not thinking much he strolls up to the bar and they hand him the bill, after adjusting his eyes a bit to the paper his heart sinks: 1400 euro.
And the girls are suddenly replaced by the larger crew of guys standing somewhat strategically in the path towards the door, now into well-oiled scam machine territory. Matt goes into full panic mode but doesn't quite lose his head here which becomes very important later. He refuses to pay, they have likely heard these types of lamentations at this point of the night from almost every tourist this scams get this far on. The bar staff menacingly hands him a menu, but not the one he saw when he walked in, this one was for the girls drinks. They come in at $230 each and you bought "Zehna" 3 and did shots with 2 others, you do the math Dutch. Holy shit, wasn't her name Zerha? and is Matt going to pay this crazy amount?
Matt's not going to quietly roll over and pay this, he asks how much his old friend Turk had to pay and all of the sudden he turns around and Turk is not here anymore. They reply "he paid local price," fully dropping the facade of normal business practices and moving into full shakedown mode, the night is taking a serious turn into a very dark alley. They also add, "you can go talk to the boss."
He might be about to shit himself here, so he asks where the nearest bathroom is, they motion towards a dark corner in the inner reaches of the bar and Matt walks that way. Once he gets in he ignites his exit plan. First he pulls 50 euro (what the drinks would have actually cost) and puts that in his pocket. Then he puts everything else, wallet included, down his underwear. Then he takes a leak to clear his mind and prepare himself for what was sure to be a tense situation with the Turkish boss man.
As he walks out, the now apparent mobsters are waiting outside the door to guide him towards the back office. He follows them and eventually comes face to face with a larger balding middle aged guy in a suit, looking uninterested but still projecting an air of menacing superiority.
"You have to pay," he says, without looking up from the papers on his desk.
Matt is naturally a pretty calm guy, but all the Valium in Thailand wouldn't make this an easy going interaction. He shifts his weight a bit and his wallet contents transfer from his boxer-briefs down his leg and rest on the top of his foot, still just barely hanging on under his pant cuff. He bends over to make it appear as though he is tying his shoe and grabs the couple cards in his hand. Hiding them behind his wrist he pretends to adjust the back of his shirt and puts the cards right in his ass crack and clenches down.
"I won't pay that crazy tab, I don't even have that kind of money, or the means to get it," his lie was good only as long as his glutes kept firing.
The boss seemed unfazed, "Well you cant leave until you pay, so if you have to call someone now is the time, do you have a phone?"
"I left my phone at my hostel," he lied, but feared a phone confiscation if he used it.
"Well you need to figure this out, it's not my problem," and "you have a tab, you must pay your tab."
And they went back and forth for what seemed like an hour before the idea of phoning the police came up. Matt at this point was ready to make a run for it, anything, as he was desperate to escape this situation.
The police talk triggered an interesting reaction from big boss man. He showed a fleeting second of apprehension at involving the police and that was all Matt needed to find his way out of this tension engulfed situation.
He was getting a little bolder in his tone now, shifting from the victim to the aggressor, "Alright lets call the cops, I doubt this is legal in any way, and I just want to leave."
Matt added, "Listen, I have 40 euro, I will give that to you as my tab was for about 35."
The boss man has lost his mojo a bit here but still wanted to portray his air of superiority. He just kind of motioned for Matt to leave and kind of grunting at him. So Matt leaves the room as two of the grunts start to follow him. As he walks through the bar area all the girls are back chatting with other staff like this was a commonplace occurrence.
He manages to get outside the bar and goes directly to the bar down the street and starts chatting up the staff and making sure to give them his name. As he looks out to the street the same two guys from the scam bar are walking by every 5 minutes or so, obviously keeping an eye on Matt.
He stays in this bar for about an hour until their visits get less frequent, and then when the goons finally give up, he pays his tab here and makes a beeline for the nearest train station to get the hell out of this neighbourhood and back to the feigned safety of his hostel, to have a beer in peace and shake off the absolute shittyness of the night and feeling of getting nearly shaken down for thousands of dollars.
This place is wild, and goes to show how important it is to always be aware of these scams. Istanbul carries so much beauty and total wonder in its history and architecture, but it hides an underbelly of a scam city just waiting to pounce on unsuspecting foreigners at every turn. Keep your head up and your eyes and ears open and you should be alright. It's all an adventure and experience. I would go back 100 times if I didn't want to see the rest of the world.
